A Completely different thought process !!!

I got a forwarded mail sometime back….It goes something like this

A different thought process !

Group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university lecturer. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the lecturer went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups: porcelain, plastic, glass, some plain looking and some expensive and exquisite, telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the lecturer said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the better cups and are eyeing each other's cups."

"Now, if Life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change." Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

So folks, don't let the cups drive you...enjoy the coffee instead

This got me thinking and my take on this piece of “vegetable soup for stomach” was

A Completely different thought process !!!

The cup holds the coffee.

The coffee that can be enjoyed is directly proportional to the cup that holds the coffee.
As all will agree, the coffee tastes its best when consumed hot. And then we have cold coffee’s too.

Some cups hold the temperature well, some don’t.
Some cups can hold hot coffee, some can't.

If the cup is of lead, then it poisons the coffee.

Again the quality of coffee will also make you choose a different cup.

Filter coffee tastes best with “Davara” And “Tumbler”. It gives the flexiblity (to some extent) control the temperature of your coffee at the point of consumption.

If you are going in for Espresso (The thick ones, referred to as shots, not the diluted american version), you can’t have a large imposing cup. You have to select a small cup other wise, you will have a problem drinking the coffee, the coffee will not stay hot for long, and you will not get a sense of fulfillment.

If you want to have a wonderful cup of cold coffee, with whipped cream, and couple of scoops of ice-cream, and a few nuts, you cannot have it in the broad based cups that you usually get, or the davara/tumbler or the small cup. You would be better off going for the taller ones, that are narrow at the bottom and wide at the top, plus you need a spoon (adding a new dimension) to dish-out and devour the ice-cream and nuts.

If you don’t have a cozy fireplace to sit by and enjoy your hot coffee, If you are on the move, you cant afford to miss your coffee, Go for the disposable cups that come with a cap, and fit a straw in, you are ready to enjoy your coffee on the move !!!.

The fundamental fact remains the same, i.e., Its the coffee that we enjoy, Not the cup. The other side of the coin is that, the cup facilitates us to enjoy the coffee.

The key, in my opinion is to understand the following fundas

1. There are different coffee’s available
2. We can choose our coffee and there by the cups.
3. Our coffee should decide our cups.
4. Best coffee needs best of cups to completely enjoy the coffee.
5. Once you have the coffee of your choice in the cup of your choice, forget the cup, enjoy the coffee.
6. If you don’t like the coffee of your choice in the cup of your choice, don’t hesitate to change the cup
7. If you don’t like the coffee in any of the cups, then the issue is not with the cup, its with the coffee. Change the coffee.
8. It might not be just enough to have a cup to enjoy your coffee, your coffee might just need a spoon too, to be enjoyed. Provide for the spoon too.

Thank God!! I did not sneeze!!!

After a pleasant stay with us, my mother in law was preparing to leave Singapore. Rema was also accompanying her. Rema had her exams lurking in the corner, and she was all wound up and tensed, all of last month.

The Indian Airlines flight was scheduled to leave the shores of Singapore at 0750 hrs. I had told them that we need to check in atleast 2 hrs and 30 minutes before the departure time.

As usual we had problem of plenty with the luggage.

Air lines and luggage. This combination is really complicated even for the well educated (By the way this is based on the sample space that has only me).

You have a 20 Kg limit in Indian Airlines. The luggage is classified as two components, Cabin luggage and Check in luggage. One theory says, that the 20 Kg limit is inclusive of the cabin luggage. Another theory says that it is not inclusive of cabin luggage. Now to add more complexity, in one of the earlier interaction with Indian Airlines, we discovered that the cabin luggage cannot be more than 6 Kg. To add another dimension to it, we were told, passengers who happen to be woman (I guess this is the most politically correct way to address female gender of homo sapiens) can have two cabin luggage. Last time when I traveled to India from Singapore, I did not weigh the cabin luggage ( Also known as Hand Luggage, “Confuse panranga pa” ).

So in totality they had about 2 suitcases which were about 23 kg each, there were 4 pieces of cabin luggage weighing in the range of 4 ~ 8 Kg, A back pack and two handbags (One for each).

We started from Jurong East. When we were in the elevator, I had this all too familiar feeling in my nose. A high pressure area was building in my nose, and it was gaining momentum and moving towards the exterior of my nasal prominences. (Alright, alright, I felt like sneezing.). It is a bad omen, (“Aba sagunam”), to sneeze when some one is going out, starting a journey etc. Me being me, I did not want my Mother In Law and Rema to think that I, somehow did not wish them a pleasant journey. I did a lot of gimmicks to apply a sudden break and somehow managed not to sneeze. I was very proud of my accomplishment. We got a taxi, hopped in. While we were half way to the airport, Rema dropped the first bomb shell. “You have the ATM card rite ?”. That’s when I realized that Rema had given me the ATM card, and I had kept it on the dining table. I gave a sheepish smile and told her that I have not.

After few minutes I realized the next blunder. I had only $25 on me. The taxi ride will easily cost $30 since the midnight fare will be applicable till 6 AM. It was 5 AM when we boarded the taxi. Rema also did not carry any local currency. She had asked me to withdraw 50 bucks and hand over to her so that when she returns it would be useful for her.

Well, I am a smart man, I am not bothered by the crisis. I asked the cabbie, if he accepts credit card. He mumbled something in a language that resembled English, but I was damn sure that it was anything but English. I switched to singlish. I asked “ Visa Can ?”. His reply was instantaneous, “Can Can lah”, “Bo visa xta charge lah” (To be understood as, Yes, We do accept credit cards, however there will be extra service charge applicable when you pay through your card)

I gave a proud smile to Rema and my Mother-In-Law. See, no problem!!.

I was so correct. "That incident" was not a problem at all when compared to what was waiting for us at the air port.

We reached airport. The ride had cost us $28. We managed to pay him in cash (Rema had some loose change).

Our next destination was check in counter of Indian Airlines.

Since we were bordering on heavy luggage and suspected excess quantity of hand luggage, I made a brilliant Idea, I put the hand luggage and check in luggage in different trolley, left my Mother-In-Law and the hand luggage in a strategic place where we can see them but the check in officer behind the desk can’t.

Me and Rema, went to the counter, with tickets and passports in hand and the two suitcases that need to be checked in.

The strategy bombed.

The first question the lady at the counter asked was, “Are you the passengers?” and she instructed us to bring the passengers to the counter. Now I had to bring my Mother In Law out from the hideout.

Now it was time for Plan B.

I let them go, choosing to sit with the hand luggage (I am smart...Ain't I?).

In next two seconds, Rema came to my hideout. She looked tensed. The lady behind the counter wanted to see the hand luggage too.

I switched to plan C. The complete disclosure of information.

We went with 4 Hand luggage. It was the check in officers turn to look alarmed. She said, “you cannot carry all these as hand luggage lah!!!” “You have to check them in lah” “Only one piece of hand luggage per person allowed lah” So she asked me to weigh the other two supposed to be hand luggage too. Total weight was close to 65 Kg (Pls note, she did not weigh the other two hand luggage, that were actually hand luggage). She mumbled something and said, “I cant allow more lah, if you have more you have to pay excess baggage lah”.

All our calculations and permutations were WRONG!

So a ticket that says luggage limit 20 Kg can actually take close to 30 Kg in check in and close to 8 KG in hand luggage so total close to 40 KG. But the limit is 20 KG. (“Dei, yaaravathu correcta sollungalenda !!”)

Then she said something that made my heart stop for a minute. She pointed my Mother-In-Laws ticket and said, “Her name is not there in the list, She cannot Travel”.

I was thinking to my self, “Damn It! I did not even sneeze!!! then why ?”

I asked her to check again. She rechecked and asked me, “Did you reconfirm your ticket?” I shot back, “This is a confirmed ticket”, She said, “correct, but you have to reconfirm lah”. It correctly confused me. If it is a confirmed ticket, then why should I re-confirm it ? A ticket that was bought by paying cash in full, that too a return ticket, who’s onward journey is already done, why should it be re-confirmed ? Now I was becoming furious. Just to add complexity to the situation, My Mother In Law’s Visa was expiring on the same day.

With the “Singapore cane” and “fine” running behind my mind, I was seriously contemplating the options. The last thing I wanted was her to become a illegal immigrant in this country where stories of hefty fines and caning are abundant.

The lady asked me to wait till 7 Am when the Indian airlines personnel would come up. It was 6 Am. One hour of waiting was something un-acceptable for me.

After some 10 mins of waiting like chitoor bus-stand dog, a lady came. She was wearing IA tag. There was this lady (I guess she was from the USA) who was supposedly traveling from Singapore to Bangalore on the same flight. She was supposed to have a confirmed booking in Business class, but she did not find her name in the list or something. She was trying her best to be nice to the lady from IA and wanted her reservation to be done immediately. I don’t know the complete background so cant comment on that.

I focused on my issue. I was waiting for this conversation between the two ladies get over. Once the passenger had done her bit of talking to the IA officer, I started, I asked her why my Mother In Law’s name was not there in the list, and demanded to know why we were not told that we should reconfirm the tickets. She calmly took the ticket and showed the print. It was in deed written on the ticket that we need to re-confirm the journey else the ticket stands cancelled.

This was one of the few occasions when I felt totally embarrassed.

It was there all the while and I never bothered to see. Ignorance of rule is not a justification for violation of the rule. I did not stand a chance if I took a confrontational approach.

She said that, she can book a ticket for us on the flight next day.

I changed my tone and stand, I explained to the official that, her visa expires today and she cannot stay in the country and since it was a Sunday, there was no way I could go to the immigration office and get her visa extended. All this lady said was “I will do my best sir” and walked off.

I was keeping a watch on that lady, she went to the counter where the passengers to Chennai, were creating a scene. For the 1 hr that I stood there, I realized that, the IA official got out of the wrong side of the bed. She was in deep mess. What ever could go wrong was going wrong for that lady that day. In that one hour, I was busy thinking about alternatives. The alternatives were few.

1. Upgrade to business class
2. Take a flight to any of the cities in India, that leaves singapre before 2359 Hrs Dec 18, 2005.
3. Go to Malasia and come back on the same day, so that we can get few more days of extension
4. Cancel Rema’s Ticket and send Mom in that ticket.
5. Last option, Go to the nearest police station and surrender explaining the situation. (Did not know what else I could do)

When all this was going on, in my mind, I was pulling my mother in law’s legs saying that, she is going to get caned and jailed. I was trying to be funny. She was tensed and visibly worried.

I remembered a dialog from the Tamil Movie, “Kurudhi Punal” where Kamal says to Nazar “Veeramgrathu yenna theriuma? Bhayam Illatha maatiri nadikkrathu !” “Valor is, to act as though you are not scared”.

Trust me, It is soooo true.

Rema was a surprise package. I expected Rema to loose her calm and expected her to get tensed the most. She stood solid. She was convinced that I will come up with some idea and get us out of trouble (Ok….Ok….This is what I want to think ok ? I don’t know what was going on in her mind, but bottom line is she was calm and she did not get worked up as I expected her to)

Then at around at 7 AM another IA official came. This lady had that air of confidence around her. She came, took some printouts, gave some instructions to the check in official, and in less than 2 minutes, she asked us to check in.

We checked in the luggage and thanked the official profusely, and I rushed them to immigration, on the way, I took a cash advance of $100 from the money changer using my credit card and gave it to Rema.

Thus, finally after all the hiccups, they left the shores of Singapore.

On my way back, when I was reflecting on the sequence of events, I was thinking to myself, “Naama thummal adakkinathukke, ithanai galattana, innum naama thumbi iruntha, yenna aairukkumo ?” (Even after me not sneezing, so much has happened, I shudder to think what would have happened if I had in deed sneezed !!!)

I was proud of my self that I did not sneeze !!!!

My first immigration

On the eventful day of March 09 2005, I walked into Bangalore airport with a heart beating faster than ever caused by the fact that the luggage was not weighed. I was told that the limit was about 20 kgs and I could barely move my newly bought monster suitcase with 12 wheels that looked like a miniature of heavy duty military truck, to tail that, there was this fully loaded maruthi 800 for my cabin luggage.

I was proud of my decision to switch to the same mobile network as Rema's (My then ex-fiancé and current wife) coz we had unlimited free minutes. I was in constant chat with Rema . Time and again I was reminding myself and Rema that in the eventuality of excess baggage scenario, she might have to pick up the stuff that I leave behind, something I learnt from athimber (Tamil bhraminical term for one's elder sister’s hubby).

The guy weighing the luggage gave an understanding smile when I struggled to put the monster truck on to the weighing machine. It weighed 24 kgs. I should have looked really pathetic or the permissible limit was more I would not know for a fact now, he let me go.

With the major part of the worry firmly put behind me, I called Rema and told her that she could go now.

I did not know that I need to fill up embarkation/de-embarkation card. I saw a old couple sitting with their passport and other papers. I noticed that they had a couple of papers more than me. I was determined that I am not letting anything to come between me and my first trip to a foreign land. I asked the lady what is the extra form that she was carrying? She looked at me like a worthless piece of dust and told that it is a mandatory form that needs to be filled, and gave another look that would have been translated to English as, “You don’t even know this, Moron?”

I rushed back to the luggage counter, filled up the form, and when I was filling the form up, I realized that travel desk at my office, had infact instructed me to look for this form and fill it properly.

Then the wait for immigration started.

The gentleman over the counter, started with my virgin passport, void of any stamping except the ones it came with. He looked at me and asked hundreds of questions. I felt like I was telling “abhivadhaye” (A brahminical self introduction that informs the listener, my leliange starting form the 3 sages who started it all !!) starting from my very first day onto this planet and what I had done till date. He was behaving like as though he had lots of problems letting me go and if I leave the country, the very next minute, the stock market will fall, and economy will take a down turn. He asked for my Id, Proof of Id, Invitation letter, Documents supporting that I am working for the organization that I had mentioned, etc, etc. He asked me if it was my first travel abroad. I thought that was the stupidest question he could ever ask. For god’s sake he has my passport right in front of him, and if he cant make out that I have not traveled outside India before, either the passport does not have enough information or he is plain dumb! This is when I lost my patience and told him since I hold a valid business visa I don’t need an invitation letter from my clients. It does not matter if this is my first time or the n’th time as long as I have a valid visa on my passport. He then put the passport on to some machine, checked all pages under a blue light. I thought he would give back the passport and say “Important Document” is missing (Like senthil in Indian movie). He called his supervisor and said, “First time travel sir”, “trichy passport sir”. Now it was the supervisors turn to interrogate me. Finally those guys reluctantly stamped the pages in passport and the embarkation cards and dismissed me from there.

Once I reached the waiting area, I regretted the fact that I was not wearing my blazer or jacket. It was cold. From there I called amma, appa informed them about the status. Then called Rema and was talking with her till the phone batteries went dead. In between I was trying to reach Kavitha (My friend who was already in Singapore). All the time I was dialing old number of Kavitha and it refused to go thru. Finally I called Raj (A friend of Kavitha and Myself) got another number, and got thru. After it started ringing, I realized that it would be close to 3 am in Singapore. So I hung up. (I got scolded by Kavitha left right and center for that is an entirely different story).

With colorful dreams of meeting beautiful airhostess and getting a cute person of opposite sex sitting next to me so that I can do a la Hum Tum, I was waiting for the boarding sign. I could see couple of beautiful faces around and I immediately stuck a deal with pullayar (Also known as Ganeshji the elephant phase Hindu god) that I shall put one “shatter coconut” (Read as “oru sethar kaai pooduven”) (An offering that is done by hitting a hard shell coconut on a hard surface, with extraordinary force so that it shatters. It symbolizes shattering one’s ego and surrender to the will of god, and in turn god shatters the obstacles that comes by in one’s way and help the person achieve the objective) if he manages to fulfill my wish. Later I realized that he did not want me to spend money on shatter coconut and he would rather prefer shattering my little heart.

Not only did he make sure that none of the beautiful faces sat next to me, he ensured that none of them boarded the flight itself. Looks like they were waiting for some other flight. To add serious insult to injury, the flight did not have air hostess ! It had stewards !!! I preferred to sleep, however these guys were being extra nice, waking me up every hour and making sure that I ate or drank whatever they gave me.

When the sleep took over me finally, I think the watch was still showing 0330 Hours Indian time. All of a sudden I felt that some one was squeezing me in such a way that my eyes started bulging and my ears started realizing that there is indeed a drum inside. I woke up to the unbearable pain of beating the ear drum from inside. It was unusually bright for a 0500 hrs morning. The onboard speakers leaked the metallic voice of the captain. All I could make out was, we were about to land and the local time was 0805 hrs. Yes! I had crossed the first time zone of my life.

The first thing that came to my mind after I landed was the nightmarish experience with the Indian immigration authorities. I was gearing up for a hostile welcome by the immigration authorities on the shores of Singapore. I had made up my mind that they are going to grill me in such a way that either I declare that I want to go back or they are going to make it abundantly clear that I am not welcome.

All these demon processes running on the back of my mind, I climbed into the corridor that hangs in thin air and connects the aircraft and the airport. Trust me nothing/no words could have prepared me for what I saw when I walked into the Changi international airport. In comparison, it made Bangalore airport look like a serious joke. The word huge stands short of describing the hugeness of the part of the airport that I saw. Yet another time I rued the fact that I did not even bother to carry the blazer in my cabin luggage. My mouth seemed to have found a new way of communication, i.e. involuntary Morse code.


I found a way to find my way. Do the obvious, follow the person who is walking in front of you. The person walking in front of me had a shawl in his one hand and passport and other documents in the other. I thought, this guy must be traveling to this place as though he does it every other day. I was proud of my leader ! We were walking at a brisk pace. He spoiled every thing when he stopped in his tracks turned back and asked me the most damaging question I ever faced till then, “Thambi, Veliyila yeppadi poganum ?” (Brother, do you know the way out ?) I told “Follow Me !” and started to lead him. I don’t know what they say about the “Three blind Mice”

On our way out, I found the most interesting place, Duty free shops. For those who had seen the forum mall in Bangalore, the place is very similar to that. You have almost every thing there. Since I had the responsibility of leading my new ward to safe exit from the maze of this airport, I could not spend much time. I found my self buying a Cocksburn Wine for 22 SGD, My first purchase in foreign currency. (For the records, it was for Ganesh’s friend who lives in Singapore. It is supposed to be very economical to buy alcohol from there)

My follower completely lost it. I guess he is seeing for the first time so much alcohol under one roof. I guess he bought two or three bottles. At the end of the corridor I found a sign leading to the immigration. There I saw a few internet kiosks. They were for free.

Now that the fun part was over, I walked to the immigration counters. I went to the counter number 14. Interestingly in India also I was in the counter number 14. There was this lady. She asked me what the purpose of visit is and asked me how long I wanted to stay. I said 30 days. She looked at me and I could make out that she was concerned. That rang lots of bells in me. She started keying in something. While doing so, she was telling me that the computer will by default will give only 10 days stay. So she is doing something to allow me to stay longer. She did all that she could to enable me to stay for 30 days and apart from that she did not ask any questions. I failed to see the reason why Indian immigration authorities were so hostile. She stamped the passport and wished me a pleasant stay.

I hoped that it would be. ...